You Have A Lot More Choices Than You Think

Do you believe that our thoughts and beliefs significantly impact how we experience this world? If we believe something to be true, positive or negative, it will directly shape our experiences and interactions.

And the interesting thing is, there is an experiment done to illustrate the impact of self-perception, and it has proven that the world doesn't see us as we are, it sees us as we believe ourselves to be.

Known as the Dartmouth Scar Experiment, which was conducted by psychologist Robert Kleck, what happened was that a group of volunteers was selected and told by the researchers that they were part of a study on how people with facial scars are treated.

A makeup artist applied a realistic-looking fake scar on each of the participants' faces, and it was shown to each of them clearly in the mirror that they would have this scar for the next part of the experiment.

After that, they told the volunteers that they would be applying moisturizer to keep the scar from cracking.

But this didn't happen, it was a deception.

What the volunteers didn't know was that their "scars" were secretly wiped away in the process.

Now, thinking that they had scars on their faces, they proceeded to the next room to talk and interact with random people for the experiment.

And when they returned to talk about their experiences, they reported negative experiences.

They reported that the other party stared at their face, were tense when looking at their face, were uncomfortable when looking at their face, or acted in a patronizing way and spoke to them with an air of superiority or with judgment.

However, all these were just in their heads; they had no scars because they had been wiped away.

The reactions were entirely imagined because the people they interacted with saw no scar, but the volunteers were so convinced they were disfigured that they interpreted every cue and reaction (a small glance, a moment of silence, awkward atmosphere, nervous laughter) as a reaction to their disfigurement.

Do you see what had happened?

The simple experiment demonstrated the powerful influence of self-perception and bias, showing that what we believe about ourselves can create a reality that confirms our own fear, even when the facts don't support it.

This is the power of self-limiting beliefs, the imaginary jail in each of our heads.

The insecurities, self-judgment, and self-victimization that we have will create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

When we believe we are flawed, we project that belief onto the world, and our subsequent interactions will validate that belief, even when in reality, they don't.

The experiment is about visible scars, what about the invisible ones? The low self-esteem, personal insecurities, past traumas, or even the negative self-talk.

It will lead us to perceive rejections that may not actually exist.

In essence, this experiment teaches us that the world doesn't see us as we are, it sees us as we believe ourselves to be.

This means that the solution often lies not in changing the world, but in changing our own perceptions and beliefs about ourselves.

In Buddhism and mindfulness, it is taught that we are not our thoughts, but rather the conscious awareness that observes them.

We are always in a constant state of "becoming" and we can "be" whatever or whoever we choose to be.

You have the free will to identify yourself as the flawed person and behave like one but we don't have to choose this.

You can think and act like a victim but you don't have to.

The thoughts and beliefs are tools that we use to navigate this world but they are not the essence of who we are.

Again, who we are is who we choose to be.

All in all, looking at this experiment, we must acknowledge the immense power of our thoughts and beliefs to shape our reality while also recognizing that we are not enslaved by them. You, the "self" is the one who has the capacity and option to choose which thoughts to listen to, which beliefs to hold onto, and which ones to let go of.

Be reminded that we are never the passive victims of our thoughts but rather the conscious observers who can choose our beliefs. Rather than having no choice, we have choices to shape our reality.

And you, my dear, are a lot more powerful than you think, and you have a lot more choices than you think too.

Don't ever forget that ok?

I hope you learn something, thank you for reading, and live well, my powerful soul friend!